How Many Pierce County Deputies Does It Take To Stop Domestic Violence?

   Really, that is my question. How many Pierce County Deputies does it take to stop a domestically violent individual? It's a question we should all be asking ourselves.  The answer seems to be "It's directly proportionate to the number of influential people you know." This is a special kind of algebra.  Power+Money*(enablers)=abuser>victim(evidence+abuser's prior bad deeds)=She's crazy liar.

  Another question: How many times do you think abuse victims are ignored and abusers allowed free passage? How many victims of this misuse of power are there? I will keep asking that and if you have any experiences you would like to share, just message me. This is a pattern. The common way things are done here. They're far too good at this, across the board, for it to be the anything else.

  When Deputy Larson responded to my 911 call, on July 10th, I recognized him. I told him that he had responded to my first call back in 2009. He immediately denied this. I wasn't surprised. It is far more common that I, remember a deputy coming to my home, than that same deputy remember me, some four years after the fact. I repeated myself and he firmly stated that no calls had ever been logged from that address, he had already checked. I repeated that he had.  He mentioned my phone number, and I realized the error. I had used the house phone number the first time. I explained that to him. He let that point go and moved on.

  It didn't strike me as odd, until much later, that a Deputy responding to a domestic call would argue with the victim about an occurrence of abuse, or that he wouldn't want to take pictures, that the prosecutor would later claim never to have received them, even though they were made part of the Domestic Violence Restraining Order evidence through filings with the court.  I have never before heard of such a concerted effort of a civil authority to refuse to do it's given job. I wouldn't believe this, if I were not living it. Let me tell you, it scares me. How easily everything can be ripped from you by those who are sworn to protect you and that you could be labeled "crazy" a "troublemaker" or "drug addict" whatever name makes treating you as less than will do. It's a bit of redirecting, not worthy of those who undertake it.  However, in taking this action they underscore my position.

    After I became aware my daughter was appearing at my ex-husband's side, my hurt...not a big enough word-my anguish knew no measure. I tried to explain my daughter's history. I had facts, records, texts and phone calls. No one cared. It didn't serve their narrative. If you think that stopping the selling of drugs in Gig Harbor is a priority, you are sadly mistaken. As long as addicts say the right things, they are free to continue as they like. I worry every day that my child will not live long enough to overcome her demons and I am filled with the helpless rage only a parent of an addict who is battling the system knows. I love my child, I am done enabling her. If the only way to help her is to expose the truth, so be it. I am never giving up on her or on truth. Never.

   I requested the recording of that first call made in 2010,  made at a time when I still believed that he didn't mean it. That he loved me. That it would never happen again and that he was sorry.
  I received a letter back from the 911 records department. It stated that it no longer existed. That call was  important because my, then husband, admitted attacking me on it. He promised to fix "this" and begged me to hang up the phone. The operator heard him, she and I talked about what he said and where he was in relation to me. She wanted to know I was attempting to get myself to a safe place. I was on the phone with her when he yelled that he loved me and then left the property.  Well ahead of Deputy Larson. I filled out a statement that time and I made this video, in case something ever happened to me.

  I sent it to my daughter, for safe keeping in March of 2009, incase anything should ever happen to me. Never guessing she already had a deeper relationship to my, then, husband than I could have ever believed.  I wrote about trying to get away from him four years ago. Well before July 10th, 2013.

     I tried to get this video I made after that attack in March 2009, submitted into evidence during the hearing for a DMVRO in 2013. I was denied this, because as I was told, Pierce County Superior Court didn't have the ability to view videos in their courtrooms. Just-ruminate on that one for a moment. That's how my entire case has been handled. As if, they believed I had found a way to go back in time and created every document which proves my abuser's guilt, because apparently I have conquered the space time continuum in order to plant these events beforehand or rather...after, which then became before, due to my time jumping, so I made it all up and they were then free to ignore me, belittle me and to refuse to uphold the laws of our state as well as Federal ones.  Not only does this create a nice package, it also is more plausible than the wild thought that they are dealing with a man whose history of abuse and assault was simply repeating itself. That is totally not believable.

     It will happen again. He will do it again and we will all have known that he was capable of whatever it is he does next.  Pierce County will be culpable. They already are.

   My abuser called the Sheriff's department before me on July 10th. To let them know I would be calling. He knew that, because I had told my daughter. I will attach the text messages between my daughter and myself. These are not new, I turned them over to the Sheriff's department. I gave them my phone with access to everything on it. Also, my computer. These things have long been out there.  Her credibility is easily brought down by her own words. Though it pains me to do so. You can compare her many conflicting statements and those of my abuser, which have changed constantly.

   I am told it's because my youngest daughter appeared with my abuser, every time he spoke to the police. That's why they believe him and not me. In over ten different interviews, or contacts with Pierce County Deputies she was present as his "stay out of jail card," his claim to honesty every single time. My child, 24 years old, an adult, but still -my daughter.

  There is no name, no form of expression that can measure the depth of my anguish, my deep what? Sadness? Loss? We humans haven't invented anything to affix to this ache that does it justice. No parent should ever know this betrayal. To know that your child...my child, not only knew what my husband was, but that she actively lied for him, against me- He beat me and she knew it. She was personally enriched for her actions. This is a mother's worth set down for all to see. One, wait two cars, one Apple laptop, various cash payouts....it is a long list the trade for parent for property.

   So, when Deputy Larson made his second visit to our residence in July of 2013, when he said my bruises "weren't too bad," when his main focus was not on what happened to me, but whether I believed my husband had been cheating, I had yet to see the game at play. I find it hard to believe that these actions were standard procedure, Deputy Larson's actions or those that came after him.  No more so than when Deputy Kreis chose not to "check" to see if there was still a RO out against my abuser when he met him at the marital residence, to not notify me of a break in, for not doing a welfare check when the Deputy discovered my abuser on the property with a garage door that was obviously kicked in. Correct police procedure was not followed so many times that these officers and their superiors are either inept or willfully derelict of duty. Which is it?  These things were done you see because the matter had already decided, I was the liar, my abuser the victim. No matter how often he continued to break the law, or how much proof I brought forth, they were never going to change from that stance. It became the official line, damn be the facts. And because, I refused to accept their predestined decisions, I would not bow my head I am made the example of. No. I will not accept this either. Never. You see this is my life. This is all I have.

   When a person finally scrapes up the courage to tell what has happening to them, and let me say, it is a hard thing to do. The worst things that a Deputy can do is to not believe them, to express an attitude of clear distain and ridicules damaging. It's emotionally, mentally devastating. When a Deputy mocks me on Facebook- it is jarring. I stay out of Pierce County as a rule now. I don't feel safe there.  I have been ridiculed for expressing that too. However, when it becomes acceptable in Deputies' minds to treat any member of the community in such a manner on social media, can you honestly say you think that this same deputy would treat me better in person? I prefer not to gamble on that one.  He has a system set up to ensure whatever he does or doesn't do, is deemed acceptable. That, to me is frightening.

   I myself, filed a complaint with Sargent Davidson about Deputy Wulik. I haven't heard back from him or anyone else for that matter. The newest stance seems to be to ignore me until I go away. This will be buried in the newsfeed soon enough. Until my abuser hurts someone else of course-then all of this will be seen as a revelation. Isn't that the way it goes here? Why have one victim when we can make multiples? Just give it time.


    On October 1, 2014 my abuser appeared suddenly on the back deck of the marital home.  I had notified his attorney earlier in the day I would be bringing a motion if he did not pay his full support. He had already let it be known that he had no intention of paying me. He stormed up the backstairs, after parking in his friend's yard and sneaking through the back way to the house. He yanked open the french doors already screaming at me. I ran to the doors and tried to keep him out as he tried to gain entry. He was calling for my dog in a menacing sing-song voice. He grabbed my arm and twisted my right wrist, which had been on the door handle and yanked the door forward into me and then back, then closed the door on my hand. I yelled at him to leave in a panic. He said he was visiting his dog.  My dog Edgar, coward under the dinning table. Edgar had been the past target of this man's wrath and he would not, thank God, come out from hiding.  He finally left after yelling "I am going to be telling you to pack your sh*t and get out of my house in a month c*nt".  I called my mom and she came right over, convincing me once again to call the Sheriff's Office. I was hesitant.I felt they weren't going to help me and they didn't care what he did to me.  But I did, because she is my mother. I try now to honor her.

Bruising on hand and scrapes October 1, 2014

The pictures here were taken of my right hand. it depicts the bruising on my hand and several abrasions and a puncture, which were bleeding still when the Deputy responded, I showed him my hand. He wasn't interested. He took no report and oddly, wasn't wearing a name badge. My mom and Stepfather were there and witnessed his lack of response. Which is why my mother insisted I document it myself. That deputy had a partner with him, in a different kind of uniform. I admit I did not see if he wore a name tag. He held back and the first Officer took the lead. I was once again frightened at my abuser's audacity and with Pierce County Sheriff's Office lack of response to it. Frankly, I was just so...shell shocked and felt hopeless that they would ever help me. My mother became a bit firm with the Deputy asking this man would have to do to me before a deputy would stop him. No answer.

The deputy did say that if I had an active restraining order that "he could do something about this." When I tried to express my fears he replied "You married him". The universal justification for all abuse, right there. Crazy, liar, drug user and the all time gold standard of reasoning it's the victim's own fault...I asked for it. I married him, that is tacit consent right there.

   I have photos and videos and witnesses and medical records, still that's not enough. This man has a long history here, in Florida and several other states as well, not enough.  I am being called a liar and I am living in fear? This is a new and the cruelest form of abuse so far. No one should have to go through this. 

   This is never going to be alright and I am going to keep proving it happened. That I be heard until someone sees the truth. Until my name is cleared and my rights restored. And until Pierce County learns to stop revitalizing it's victims. 

   I have requested copies of the police reports surrounding all of these incidents. To post them here. So far I have received nothing. In some cases I have been told nothing was filed, which is odd considering I have copies of the complaints I filed, sent to me, blind copied, via the County's web sight. So I know they have them, and know they exist. Also, before they went radio silent to me, I heard from 3 sergeants and another bureaucrat within the Pierce County Sheriff's Department, they contacted me in response to that paper trail.  It exists. I have just been denied access to them, so far. 

   I have no idea how this abusive individual maneuvered his way around the system so well, however it will come out.  In every incidence he came after me, he contacted me.  The more I try to prove I am telling the truth, the harder Pierce County attempts to paint me a liar. I am not going away. Not ever. I have value. They are wrong, I am not crazy, I am tenacious. To a fault. 

  

  Also, it's not appropriate that our county has dragged me through the mud and denied me my civil rights, as well as my right to my own property, and my right to a fair hearing, among the multitude of other things that they have now done.  And to do nothing would be to accept it. That I can't do. I myself, question the resources and manpower that have been spent to keep this harassment of me going. How many meetings, background searches, lawyers consulted and the like? You have a right to know, and the why to the thing. These our our employees, and this is our money they are using against us. I didn't sign off on that did you? Do we now have a fund used to denigrate victims with impunity? This needs to be investigated, all of it. We are all deserving of some transparency and honesty in the actions of our civil servants. Please, use your rights to Freedom of Information and request copies of all documents involved. They may try to stonewall one, but they can't stonewall all.

  When Ed Troyer socializes with Deputy Wulik's band....and Deputy Wulik gets a free pass on bullying victims on social media, that is worth noting. When multiple deputies train with the man who supplied guns to my abuser and neither is prosecuted, that is worth noting. When my daughter's drug dealers are offered to Pierce County Deputies on a silver platter and they choose to not pursue them...you deserve to know why. Don't let anyone try and tell you that Pierce County is tough on opiate dealers. Not as long as they turn a blind eye, refusing to gather evidence that would harm the case they themselves are trying to trump up against a victim, who they refuse to see as one. 

 A woman should never have to suffer these horrible series of events upon finally finding the mental and physical resources to ask for help. To say "he hits me. Help me, please." She most certainly shouldn't be made the target of the system which touts itself as the solution to Domestic Abuse. 

  Not much has changed. Does that make you angry when I say that? Imagine being a victim and having to find it out it hard way. I hope you never find yourself here. Hiding, alone, marred by lies and innuendo. I pray that if you ever need help, a safe haven, you are granted it. Without judgment or recrimination. I hope these things, but I also know they will not happen on hopes and prayers. And so I write. I have to. This is all I have. Nothing has changed, but it will. It has to. Because we all matter and God is watching.. 

Again, especially in our present times, let me reiterate, I am pro law enforcement. They have dangerous, stressful occupations. I appreciate the good officers. However I am not going to be silent to abuse of power, I can't.